13 August 2012

Resuming the Discipline

I have not posted since late June, partly due to loss of discipline after a week with no Internet, partly because I was preparing for a 2-week residency at Goucher College -- the beginning of earning a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Nonfiction degree.  Having returned from the residency with a much better sense of the amount of work (a lot) I have to do between now and December, I'm not sure I can maintain the regular schedule of bi-weekly posts recommended by blog gurus.  However, I have decided to try.

Rather than launch immediately into the subject of my June 25 post (Chapter Seven of Eckhart Tolle's book, "The Power of Now"), I will write today about the two intensive weeks of workshops and lectures and readings and managing the chronic pain of migraines.

It wasn't easy.  And it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.

Before I'd left DC for Towson, Maryland, I'd purchased some items that I thought would help provide for my physical comfort and for migraine mitigation.  Some of these were expensive, yet there is not one I wish I had not purchased.

1. A study pillow with good back support, Cequal Bedlounger.

2. A pair of non-prescription, tinted and lightweight glasses for use in rooms with fluorescent lighting and when on the computer: TheraSpecs.

3. A thick and supportive mattress pad: Tempurpedic.

4. A plastic pot in which to boil water for tea: Hot Pot.

5. Plenty of my favorite tea bags (Mighty Leaf Breakfast Tea); fresh-ground peanut butter from the Yes! Market down the street; rice crackers.

The car was loaded with stuff in a way that was almost embarrassing.  Had I not been so sure that I needed these things in order to not just get through the residency but really thrive in it, I would have felt like a spoiled child.  But I did need them, they did help me through the residency, and I am glad for all of them.

I only missed one workshop and one lecture. That's not to say I did not have migraine pain any other day. That's to say there was only one day when the pain was so bad that I could not sit up.  On the other days, the pain was manageable if I rested and napped during the breaks and took great care with my diet.  Yet these practices would not have helped much had I not a pair of glasses that just about eliminated the deleterious effects of fluorescent lights and computer screen glare; a mattress pad that supported my ailing back and allowed me good sleep; a pot in my room for boiling water for tea; a study pillow that supported my head and so allowed me to work on the computer even when I had a migraine; and my snacks that tided me over to the next meal.

The point of this post is to say that we need not be ashamed of what is required to support our engagement with life.  After more than two years of resting and hoping the migraines would ease, setting out for school was exciting, affirming and good for me.  I could not have managed either the thought of going or the actual being there had I not planned so carefully to take care of myself.

Do what it takes to care well for your pain-filled self!  Perhaps you will find, as I did, that you will then be able to engage in life at a new level.

I would love to hear from you.  Please use the Comment link below, or email me at carold.marsh@gmail.com.  Thank you.


  1. Great post - I am terrible about thinking about what I need. I get places with my two little girls and the have everything they could possibly need - I have nothing for me.

  2. I have not been a Mom, but having watched many other Moms I can see that there are overwhelming reasons to think of everyone else first. Yet I also know that we can be better present to others when we are taking care of ourselves. How to find this balance is another matter.